I get you as a mother for the past 21 years. I was a single mother, a working mother, and now a married stay at home mom. No matter what type of mom you are Mothers Day can be hard.
If you have no one to help your child get you a card and or a gift, you may get nothing. On a day where your friends are on social media posting about brunch with their kids. Or the special treatment they received it may rub salt in the wound.
Heck, many of us with significant others or spouses like mine who are great a lot of things but suck at holidays. I get nothing on days like this.
I am not hoping this year. One year my husband got me a card, and he intended on having the kids sign the card. I found the card in the car months after Mothers Day. Since this was in our Toyota Corolla we had ages ago this means I can recall an effort made on his part ten years ago.
A few years ago he gave me a gift card to Sephora. In this family I'm the one who remembers special days and takes care. So when someone acknowledges a special day for me it's rare. So rare I cannot recall the last time I felt as if they appreciate me.
I am not bitter either. I won't say it is easy. See I recognize that while my family sucks at showing me I am appreciated that appreciation is not everything.
Another issue is money. Many people see money as an obstacle they cannot overcome. A dime need not be spend a dime to let someone know they appreciate and love you. Some people cannot get past that. If they cannot afford a card and flowers or some small gift, they figure why bother.
A lot moms would be more than happy to sleep in late on Mothers Day. Wake up to a clean house, enjoy a shower with the door closed and eat a hot meal in peace. None of these things need money.
Many moms are struggling. They could suffer from be depression. Or experienced a loss. Some mothers do not get enough help. Their spouse or significant other may work two jobs and is never home and is alone often. Mother's Day reminds them of what they are missing.
We all struggle and Mother's Day can be a day that causes us pain instead of happiness. And that is ok. If anyone tries to put you down or set, you straight for it ignore them.
There is a difference between being ungrateful and being hurt. Now if your family got you a card and took you out to breakfast and you get mad that is petty.
Let's say your kids brought you a card they made at school. Your spouse did not make sure as a family they honored you on Mothers Day which is wrong. As a couple who shares children that is disrespectful.
The single mom that got nothing? Single parenting is lonely. Personal experience taught me that.
If your husband works two jobs and cannot afford anything. This can be very hard. Go easy on your spouse because he is struggling too.
So what do you do if you suspect you may get nothing, do your own planning. You heard me right, treat yourself take your kids out to brunch, get a pedicure, or buy yourself a treat. Hack I would even drive to Target give each kid two bucks and tell them pick out a card.
If you cannot afford to go out talk to your kids. Explain what Mothers Day is. Help them make you a card, lay on the couch all day and watch tv with your kids, or go for a walk do what you want.
Being a parent is hard. To complicate things once a year children are supposed honor their mothers. Which makes little sense for families with small children. Young children cannot understand and are not old enough to plan. This means someone has to remember mom. In a lot of families the person who plans is you guessed it Mom!
Do not to sweat Mother's Day. Stay off social media if that helps. Do what you want and try to remember today is about you being with your kids. They love and appreciate you even if they never say so. Life and parenting is full of challenges. Don't let one holiday make you think you are not enough or loved.